Why is luck never on my side? I try to do the right thing, be a good person, stay out of trouble; so why does trouble always seem to find me? `I’d like to say that it was PRESS and all the strange occurrences that are causing it but my luck has always run on the unpredictable side. It is fair to say that PRESS has afforded me the most interesting interactions with the public, more than any other job I’ve had. Now I’m just trying to figure out if it’s PRESS that is creating the O.H.’s or if it’s the neighborhood that is causing them to occur and draw people sensitive to them here.
All I know is that things seem to be happening more often, at least according to Rebecca. Though she it’s even too sure how long they been happening, her memory of events that happened over a year ago are only just starting to come back to her; but just as easily as they come, they can again just as easily slip away again. I know that because of this Becca’s using this blog as a way to keep track and remember all these incidents, it’s making me wonder why she is affected this way while I’m not? I remember all my interactions, every little detail, even when I couldn’t comprehend exactly what I was seeing.
The thing that Becca and I are finding to be the hardest is trying to figure out who already knows about the O.H.s and if we can trust them, or who we can trust to tell about the O.H.s and who we think will believe us. Damon is someone that we would like to talk to about all this but his reactions to these events, to the things that have happened right in front of him has to lead us to believe that 1) He knows what is happening and what the O.H.s are, but he isn’t 100% sure that he can trust us or that we can see what is happening too, 2) He can’t see them at all, he is just not able to see
It feels like I just can’t keep up with all these changes and the second I feel like I’ve made sense of my situation, a whole gaggle of things happens all at once and I’m right back to the beginning and I realize that I really don’t understand anything.
I have to ask myself if I can even trust what I’m feeling and seeing? Or am I just convincing myself that anything out of the ordinary is O.H. related when in reality it could just be a weird encounter? Like a few weeks ago when that guy came to the store looking for Damon, he said he was from the B.I.A and I immediately assumed that he knew about the O.H.s and that he was somehow a part of it. But he didn’t actually do anything or say anything that would suggest that he did know about any of that. My mind just automatically turned it into a “he knows something” situation, without even considering the possibility that he was exactly who he said and had come because he actually wanted to talk to Damon.
I need to talk to Rebecca when she gets back, I think that between the two of us we should be able to make some headway into the mystery of PRESS.